By Mayo Clinic Staff
Depression is a powerful illness, that affects many people. Most don’t think and or believe that they may be depressed during your life. I picked this subject because it is now hitting my house.
Lauren has become very withdrawn, and is spending way to much time in her room alone. When I check on her she is just laying in bed. When I try to get her to come down stairs most of the time her response is “I just want to lay here”. That’s when my heart breaks for her. There are days when she will be on the go, but for the most part she is alone. Lauren is a beautiful 25-year-old women, with so much to offer in life. The Dear Lord gave her a second chance, and I need to help her find her way. After saying that, I thought to myself a mother can only do so much. So I am doing a shout out to her friends, we need her to get out of this funk.
After reading the list below, I can say that I have fallen into quite a few of the lines. My feelings are when Lauren is sad, I’m sad. I find myself very frustrated, helpless, sad and just fed-up. We have been together almost every day for the last 3+ years. I am not complaining, I would have not been anywhere else during that time. But now, changes NEED to be made in Lauren’s life as well as mine. That old saying “you act like the people you hang out with.” So true.
I have spoken to a counselor, about the situation here. I was told to make a list of things to help identify the source or sources that are making her feel this way. Well, I did. I cannot say what we came up with as the source in public, but Lauren needs to do some real soul-searching as to what she wants in her life. In the mean time, I am putting a call out to her friends to give her the kick in the butt she needs to get motivated again. A mom can only do so much.
Below is a list of symptoms to help identify depression.
Although depression may occur only one time during your life, usually people have multiple episodes of depression. During these episodes, symptoms occur most of the day, nearly every day and may include:
Feelings of sadness, emptiness or unhappiness
Angry outbursts, irritability or frustration, even over small matters
Loss of interest or pleasure in normal activities, such as sex
Sleep disturbances, including insomnia or sleeping too much
Tiredness and lack of energy, so that even small tasks take extra effort
Changes in appetite — often reduced appetite and weight loss, but increased cravings for food and weight gain in some people
Anxiety, agitation or restlessness — for example, excessive worrying, pacing, hand-wringing or an inability to sit still
Slowed thinking, speaking or body movements
Feelings of worthlessness or guilt, fixating on past failures or blaming yourself for things that are not your responsibility
Trouble thinking, concentrating, making decisions and remembering things
Frequent thoughts of death, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempts or suicide
Unexplained physical problems, such as back pain or headaches
For some people, depression symptoms are so severe that it’s obvious something isn’t right. Other people feel generally miserable or unhappy without really knowing why.
Many of us experience some of these symptoms during our normal lives, but when it continues then it is time to take action. I have let it go to long in my home, time to identify and make changes.
When talking with the councilor, she helped me to realize that we have just been going through the motions of our every day rituals. Doing the same thing every day, day in and day out. So when something new is introduced to us, our reaction is to decline if possible. With that said, we are going to make new rituals. Time to start saying yes, when friends ask us out, time to work on what makes us happy. Not what makes us comfortable.
I also realized that Lauren is not the only one with a second chance with life, I do to. All those years of always worrying about Lauren’s health is behind me now. She is stronger and healthier. Just have to work on motivation.
So I am going to end this post with this thought. I was using the word rituals instead of habits. Habit is something we just do without thinking, but if we say the word rituals it is something we want to do. Think about it.
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